I am a bisexual woman, now past the halfway point of my life even if I live to be one-hundred.  I have been bisexual since my teens, at a time when I don’t think I was even aware such a label existed.  I was vaguely aware of an attraction to members of my own sex as early as 12 or 13.  I also followed a very typical course of crushes and infatuations on boys at that same time.  I started dating in 9th grade and went out with the opposite sex, exploring those sexual avenues in a usual heterosexual fashion.  My attraction to girls at that time was expressed in fantasy and in my short-story writing where I would put myself in a male role and think about making love to a woman.

During my sophomore year in high school, two very significant events occurred.  I met and fell in love with the man I would marry, and I made love for the first time with a woman, the classmate who had been my best friend since the start of 9th grade.  Both relationships continued as intense, sexual entities for my entire junior year in high school.

During the summer between my junior and senior years of high school, I got engaged to the man in my life.  I told him about the sexual relationship with my best friend a couple of months into the engagement, feeling uncomfortable with  secrecy and furtiveness about it.  My intent was to end the sexual aspect of my relationship with Jane, but nonetheless, I felt Dave needed to know that he was marrying a woman who could love another woman and find great pleasure in her arms.  Could he accept that kind of woman as his wife?

He said he could.  We got married in June following my high school graduation.

I was very, very young when we got married — not even quite 18.  I had a lot of learning about myself to do, a lot of growing to do.  Even though my sexual relationship — and my friendship — with Jane ended by the time we graduated from high school, I soon realized that my sexual relationship with her was not a fluke in the scheme of my life.  My attraction to women was very alive within me, and I wanted to experience it! 

We moved here to the “BiCities” in the Upper Midwest in the mid-1970s when I was 20-years-old, and I “came out” here, actively exploring my sexuality in my early 20s.  Let’s just say for now that I learned an awful lot about myself and my orientation during those years!  I’ll write more about the details in the blog posts.

Following this period of intense exploration from about 1976 to 1981, I entered a 17-year period of sexual monogamy with my husband, although I never at any time ceased to consider myself bisexual.  I just had other things occupying my time and energy — college and work, most noteably — and grew fatigued with relationships that didn’t seem to be working out satisfactorily.

This 17-year era of monogamy ended in 1998, and I began dating women again, met through various Personals sites on the Internet.  One such relationship lasted for three years, from 1998-2001.

Since that relationship ended, there has been some dates, some new experiences, some heartache.  But I’m still seeking that special relationship with a woman that will be a steadfast part of my life.